With the arrival of younger members to the community, we find the development of a very special relationship between Eugene and his Oblates: the concept of his being the father of his religious family. It was the characteristic quality that would mark the lifelong relationship between Eugene and his Missionaries, and we will encounter this constantly in his writings.
In 1818, we come across this idea his retreat journal:
I believe my fault is that of a father who loves his children too much..
I believe I must be satisfied with being vigilant over myself so as to love only for God, and in dependence on God, those who are worthy of being loved on account of their virtues and good qualities…
Retreat journal, May 1818, O.W. XV n.145
At the age of 73, for example, he wrote:
But since the Lord has given me the heart of a father to an eminent degree, if I sense all the consolations, I also experience all the weaknesses. I most certainly love you with a supernatural love, but I also love you in the manner of, and I dare say, more tenderly than earthly fathers love.
Letter to Jean Baptiste Conrard, 19 March 1855, O.W. XI n. 1260
With this in mind, let us return to 1820 and the letter that he wrote to the students and novices at Laus, in which we can understand the background to the sentiments he expressed:
Yes, my dear children, it is by redoubling my holy love for you that I wish to prove my gratitude; for your part, continue to regard me as your best friend, as truly your father.
Letter to the students and novices at Notre Dame du Laus, 29 November 1820,
O.W. VI n. 56
“One father is more than a hundred schoolmasters.” George Herbert
I’ve thought about todays writings for a bit now. Interesting to look at Eugene’s ‘love’ in 1818 and then in 1850 where he still loves, probably even more if I can qualify it that way, for the nuances have changed. In 1818 he loves but almost in a sense seems to limit himself and yet as time passes his “all for God” becomes deeper and truer. It seems that often (but not always) time and age bring a softening and subtle changes. Life-long transformation (revealing of the hidden and of what is already there within us) occurs and we experience and are able to live and love more freely. Or perhaps it is just that I relate in that way because that has been my experience of God and love.
As I wrote this I started to think of how Eugene truly had a heart as “big as the world” and he was/is a father to so many. I look at a few people I have known, good people who truly ‘loved’. They did not found a congregation, or a family, and they will never be on the official ‘rolecall’ of the Church’s saints, but they were mothers and fathers, parents to many of us. Their loving was like Eugene’s, and like ours. I thank God for those people, I thank God for Eugene, who has become an inspiration for me, a Father in a sense.
Faces of those I love, many of whom I often struggle with, pass before me. How today can I let go of my hurts and simply love them? How today might I not revel in the slight that was shown to me, but rather acknowledge it and let it go? How might I today not demand any type of ‘basic’ levels of qualification for my love? How today might I simply love, allow God to love through me (or inspite of me) – even if it be only in my thoughts?
I am touched by today’s reading. Today is a desert day at the novitiate and the theme is the “Beloved of God”. Fr. Rudy spoke of a son who longed to hear the words “I love you” from his father before his death. How many long to hear the same words?
As I ponder this, I wonder, we have more freely embraced his passion, vision, work ethic and temper and for got to balance it out with tenderness, tears and emotions. Would it really hurt us to say, “I love you to a brother/sister”, Would our facade come crumbling down? Would we become weak?
As the community continues the call of the Chapter in regard to community life, I think the founder has something to share with us which in return he want us to share with others. His love. Our Father General, Louie is teaching us this through his presence, his transparency, his affection and love.
Today is the Birthday of Joseph Samarakone, OMI India (Sam is the guru/teacher at Aanmodaya Ashram). We share a love that is found in the Cave of the Heart of Christ Jesus who loved us first and calls us to do the same. Love your brother, Jack,omi
Well…..
While I consider myself “Oblate” in how I relate to and serve those I encounter, it is no secret that I am no great fan of Eugene. He is the founder and father of my beloved OMI family and I truly admire and try to follow his ideals but, to me, he is often not very saintly and today’s offering just re-enforces that.
“….so as to love only [ ] those who are worthy of being loved on account of their virtues and good qualities…”
This tells me he is losing sight of his own mission to minister to the poor, the marginalized, the outcasts of society. He is limiting his attention to those who think like he does – ‘You there, you love God like I do so I will help you. You, yes you on the other side over there, you have a bad attitude so I have no time for you.’
Who does Eugene think he is to judge who is worthy of being loved?
“but I also love you in the manner of, and I dare say, more tenderly than earthly fathers love.”
As a mere “earthly father,” I take exception to that. It sounds like he went on a bit of an ego trip there for a while.
“for your part, continue to regard me as your best friend, as truly your father.”
Forget humility; is this not a little narcissistic, attention seeking?
Ah well, perhaps these 3 quotes, taken from different times and out of context, just rubbed me the wrong way. He was still a great man, a great visionary and a great activist. The mission goes on.
May The Lord pour down His peace over those who rest from their labours on this holiday.