Eugene’s fiery nature would have instinctively led him to let loose with an angry vindictive outburst:
Certainly, one’s malicious nature that has to be crucified would revel in this circumstance if, with a haughty tone proportionate to the outrages that I endure, I went and notified His Grace the Archbishop
that I want nothing more from his diocese,
that I will take back my house to do what I think best with it,
that I give up the youths and let them do what they want and
that I lash out with all the nastiness that the humiliation of this business pushes me to take on those who are the cause of it and
that, in order that there be no mistake about it, I am going to print all that I have done for the good of my country and the obstacles that self-interest and jealousy of others have never stopped to put against me, etc…
Fortunately good sense prevailed and Eugene controlled himself!
But God would hold me to account. I shall not do it unless you do not wish to put up with it anymore.
Letter to Henri Tempier and Emmanuel Maunier, 19 October 1817, O.W. VI n. 25
I think that this day’s postings is one of the reasons I so much like Eugene, am inspired by him and try to learn from him. He was/is real! Eugene shared all of his human messiness as well as his holiness. He reacted before responding – even if only in his thoughts and his letters. He moved through moments from one place to another, always living in the place where he gave his all to God.
And he shared these parts of his jourey, which for me offers great hope. For I find more and more that I am like Eugene on my journey – I love greatly but I also react instinctively and as I have written here in the past, the picture of my reaction is one of hurt and anger before giving it over to God and allowing God to reshape all that into love.
Eugene you show me my humanness, my weakness and frailties that are always there, while at the same time helping me to recognize with truth the goodness, the God within to whom I give my all. I too am one of God’s beloved and that really says it all.